I Am that Hypocrite.

I am that hypocrite who arrogantly barked at people for their use of drums in church music, yet rationalized my way into ignoring my anger and lust problems.

I am that hypocrite who wore a sharp tie and sports jacket to church on Sunday mornings, yet pounded the steering wheel and mumbled frustrations about the slow drivers I encountered as a raced to be on time for Sunday school.

I am that hypocrite who would argue for hours with the Jehovah’s Witness kid down the street about his heretical beliefs, and moments later get into a screaming match with my mom about why I didn’t want to do my chores.

I am that hypocrite who proudly carried a big annotated Bible to worship services, yet would rarely pick it up between Sundays… unless I needed to argue with people over an interpretation issue.

I am that hypocrite who openly decried the use (and the people who adopted the use) of Medicaid and Welfare assistance programs, yet rarely cared to donate – above the “required 10%” – to any missions or charities who assist people in their real times of need.

I am that hypocrite who spent 15 minutes making sure his hair was just right, but rushed past more than one person stuck on the side of the road on my way to worship Jesus.

I am that hypocrite who looked down my nose at friends who held hands or kissed before marriage, yet I tried to cover up the fact that I even liked girls. 🙂

I am that hypocrite who perfectly recited every Bible memory verse at VBS and Sunday school, all with just the slightest smirk of pride on my face and pervasive arrogance in my heart.

I am that hypocrite who sang loudly and lifted my hands in praise to Jesus on Wednesday nights, yet totally ignored God’s mission to the lost on Thursday mornings.

I am that hypocrite who winced in pride when another church soloist would go off-key; yet all the while tell my own admirers, “All glory to God, I sing for Him alone.”

I am that hypocrite who openly criticized churches who changed traditional methodologies in order to reach the rapidly growing “un-churched” population, yet daily ignored Christ’s command to share His hope with those who didn’t know Him.

I am that hypocrite who went to India to share the love of Jesus Christ with the hurting and lost, yet ran from a poor, destitute leper like a scared kitten…with my hand on my wallet.

 

God is Satisfied. 

I am that hypocrite. Imperfect in every way.  A sinner to the core. Pride was my game and perfection was my claim to fame.

Yet now I cling to the only One who is righteous, the Just One who died for the unjust (see 1 Peter 3:18).

A hypocrite I am, yet a Savior I have received. And by His grace my faith does not stand in who I am or in what I know, but in Who I know… and He is everything to me. Praise Him, not me.

And here’s the crazy thing: God is satisfied. But He is not satisfied with me – I cannot satisfy Him by anything that I’ve done, am doing, or will do. He is only and perfectly satisfied in His Son. Therefore, God is satisfied because when He looks at me He sees His Son. And He says that everyone who is in His Son has everything that is the Son’s – His life, joy, peace, love, and wisdom, but most of all a relationship with the Him, the Father. Wow. That’s grace.

I know that God cannot and will not be satisfied with me, a two-faced, messed up sinner. So I cling to the Son. I Trust in the Son. He is the only One who could satisfy the just demands of the righteous Father. And the Son, Jesus Christ, is Enough.

The apostle Paul triumphantly declared these words to the followers in Corinth, “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17; italics added for emphasis)

What about you? To what are you clinging?

 

– Michael J. Breznau 12.8.12

Author: Michael Breznau

:: Who I AM: Husband | Father | Pastor | Speaker | Author | Singer | :: I am a redeemed follower of Jesus, and I'm passionate about inspiring others to follow Him with radical faith. | :: What I DO: I love and pursue knowing the Triune God. I am crazy-in-love with my amazing wife and children. I serve as Staff Pastor and Missions rep for LifeChange Action. Prior to my current role, I had the privilege of serving as the Lead Pastor of North Park Baptist Church in Grand Rapids, MI, and Pastor of Youth and Christian Education at Evangel Baptist Church in Taylor, MI. | :: The Wallpaper: God gave me the opportunity to be trained for ministry at Dallas Theological Seminary, where I completed the Master of Theology program (Th.M in Pastoral Ministries; magna cum laude). I also hold a B.A. in Ministry and Music from North Tennessee Bible Institute & Seminary.

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1 Comment

  1. Thank you for being so honest and sharing your heart. I’m so glad I married you. 🙂

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  1. Confessing Imperfection. | Grace Exposed - [...] Here’s My Confession: I am that Hypocrite. Click on this link to read my confession: http://www.graceexposed.org/2012/12/08/i-am-that-hypocrite/ or simple locate the…

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